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Correction for ~CicadaOkami on 
~ Alright, lets get right to it.
I think the main problem you had with this is the facial anatomy. The eyes were too high, causing the hairline to be too high. This also lead to the nose seeming very long. The hair also seemed to be plastered to the head. The could explain why you thought the part looked odd. On the bottom right of the picture, I drew a face to simply show you where the features would be placed. I also drew a random hairstyle to show you how the hair lays on the head.
Please remember that I am not perfect in any way. Don't try to copy my drawings. You will just pick up on my mistakes. The best way to improve it look at real life pictures.
I wasn't exactly sure how to draw the right eye thing (it would be her left) So I drew her eye closed. For the eye on the left (her right), make sure that the eyelashes are connected to the rim of the eye, or eyelid, not the crease.
Noses are difficult to draw, and I know my way is a little weird. I don't like drawing noses, but I had to find some way to make it look like there was a nose there. To actually get good at drawing noses, look at real ones. They are quite interesting really.
Some other things I think could be improved:
Her shoulders should be wider, and her collar bone seemed weird. Collar bones are fragile things. They slant down, and form a little semi circle in the middle of the chest. Also, with your shading, pick a light source and stick to it. If you look at my gallery at some of my other corrections, I go more into detail about that.
Think about how hair falls. It is not a bunch of lines, it's more like ribbons. It flows and it strays.
About the arms: It really is hard to explain exactly where to put them, but if you look at real people, or good anatomy tutorials, you will get a feel for it. I drew them in to see if it would help any.
Well, I think I'm done. Hope I didn't sound harsh, and sorry for my wordiness. I hope this helps you.
Well, have a nice day,
Your constantly working friend,
Ruby Stone
~ Alright, lets get right to it.I think the main problem you had with this is the facial anatomy. The eyes were too high, causing the hairline to be too high. This also lead to the nose seeming very long. The hair also seemed to be plastered to the head. The could explain why you thought the part looked odd. On the bottom right of the picture, I drew a face to simply show you where the features would be placed. I also drew a random hairstyle to show you how the hair lays on the head.
Please remember that I am not perfect in any way. Don't try to copy my drawings. You will just pick up on my mistakes. The best way to improve it look at real life pictures.
I wasn't exactly sure how to draw the right eye thing (it would be her left) So I drew her eye closed. For the eye on the left (her right), make sure that the eyelashes are connected to the rim of the eye, or eyelid, not the crease.
Noses are difficult to draw, and I know my way is a little weird. I don't like drawing noses, but I had to find some way to make it look like there was a nose there. To actually get good at drawing noses, look at real ones. They are quite interesting really.
Some other things I think could be improved:
Her shoulders should be wider, and her collar bone seemed weird. Collar bones are fragile things. They slant down, and form a little semi circle in the middle of the chest. Also, with your shading, pick a light source and stick to it. If you look at my gallery at some of my other corrections, I go more into detail about that.
Think about how hair falls. It is not a bunch of lines, it's more like ribbons. It flows and it strays.
About the arms: It really is hard to explain exactly where to put them, but if you look at real people, or good anatomy tutorials, you will get a feel for it. I drew them in to see if it would help any.
Well, I think I'm done. Hope I didn't sound harsh, and sorry for my wordiness. I hope this helps you.
Well, have a nice day,
Your constantly working friend,
Ruby Stone
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Comments3
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You didn't sound harsh at all! You helped alot, thank you 
!
!